This is a list of what would make the perfect brokerage:
A Therapy Dog: Dog-friendly offices are fantastic. It makes the atmosphere more relaxed and provides a much needed cuteness factor. Every brokerage should have a white, fluffy therapy dog that walks around and loves to be pet. It would relieve stress and make everyone happy. No cats.
Ping Pong Table: How great would it be to take a break from doing nothing to kick the shit out of your coworkers in table tennis?
Catered Gourmet Food for Office Meetings: The only thing that gets me to “mandatory office meetings” is free food. However, it has to be good. Stale bagels and dated cream cheese won’t cut it. Hell, I would sit through MLS training for five hours if there were free double doubles.
Reserved Covered Parking for All: At some offices, only the top agents have reserved parking. I am not a top agent. But, this doesn’t mean I should park a mile away or pay ten bucks at a meter to check my mail.
An Invincible Printer: Imagine a printer that never breaks and is never in use? Heaven.
Sound Proof Cubicles: Some agents talk on the phone like they are constantly communicating with their deaf grandmother. I don’t want to hear the dude next to me scheduling his prostate exam when I’m trying to call some expired listings.
A Destruction Room: Every office should have a room with a baseball bat, a punching bag, and a bunch of shit agents can destroy when their 3:00 PM cancels at 2:59 PM.
Delegated Lead Equality: Imagine an office that actually cycled the leads evenly amongst all the agents?!
No Desk Costs: Last year I think I paid more money to be a realtor than I actually made. Parking, MLS dues, desk costs, and everything adds up. I shouldn’t be paying that much to do my job. Cover it for me!
Open Bar: I would never leave the office. Ever.